


The Light Within

by HopePrincess



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Drama & Romance, F/M, Fix-It of Sorts, Force Bond (Star Wars), Mental Health Issues, Post-TRoS, Pregnancy, Rating May Change, Romance, SPOILERS for TROS, Slow Burn, Tags May Change, force drama
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:42:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21913123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HopePrincess/pseuds/HopePrincess
Summary: SPOILERS FOR TROS, DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE SPOILED :)Summary in the notes, will add summaries once the movie has been out for a few weeks. This story is good for people who did not like the ending or want to see my version of what could happen next!
Relationships: Finn/Rose Tico, Kylo Ren & Rey, Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 47
Kudos: 223





	1. A New Home

**Author's Note:**

> Summary: Rey decides that it is time to let her past die and settles on Tatooine to carry on the legacy of the family she loved so much. She discovers that Force works in more ways that she imagined and finds out that her place in this story may be more than she what she thought. She knows she must find her way back to Ben, but what she does not know is what the Force has in store. A thousand generations now live in this story.  
> Basically this is my continuation of Star Wars! It will be told in the POV of Rey, Ben and eventually some other characters as well.

Tatooine was the most lifeless planet in the galaxy, everyone knew that there was nothing there but barren lands, hot days that seemed to go on forever and cold lonely nights that seemed to go on even longer. A place for those who were truly alone.

A place that once, in a time that now seems eons ago, Rey would have never imagined calling home. 

Yet, now she could not imagine living anywhere else. 

Finn could not understand it when she loaded what few belongings she had onto the Falcon after the celebrations lulled into a quiet, could not understand why she would return to another desert when she was now free to explore the whole galaxy. 

_ “Rey, the war is over, we can go find home,” _

She could not bare to tell him that her home was long gone. Instead she gave him a tight hug, a promise to write often and that she had known he was force sensitive all along much to his surprise but that she could not train him. 

_ “You will find your belonging in it, I know it,” _ she had said, hoping he could not hear the cracks in her voice and sense the sadness in her soul. 

Rose had been more understanding, knowing that victory could never ease the pain of loss. She gave her a tight hug, one reminding her of Leia, and Rey just knew that it was people like Rose who would stitch back together the broken fragments of the galaxy. 

_ “We will make their deaths count,” _ Rose had whispered, even though she did not know whose death had broken Rey,  _ “We will return hope,” _

Chewie had just given her a soft roar, one that made Rey feel that he knew just what had happened in the dark trenches of Exegol.

Poe had been confused, telling her that they needed her to help rebuild the Republic and the Light. Rey had simply shook her head, she knew Poe Dameron whose whole life had always been committed to the cause would never understand. Nevertheless he agreed to fly her to Tatoonie and left BB-8 in her care since he would be “working” more, though mainly she believed he was just worried she would become a hermit and wanted an excuse to drop by to check on her. 

At first she thinks she’s made a mistake, that Tatoonie was not the place she was meant to call home. The hot still air suffocates her reminding her of a lifetime she desperately wants to forget but knows will always be a part of her. She feels the urge to run away, maybe back to the ocean island of her dreams, but then she finds the long abandoned set of huts and knows that this is her destiny. Knows that the all too familiar spirit that is both comforting and heart wrenching calls to her like nothing ever has before. 

The first thing she does is bury the two sabers, wrapping them together with reverence and care as if she was burying their makers. Afterall a Jedi’s weapon deserves respect. 

Later she walks back to the huts, holding back tears when she stumbles across an old woman. 

At first she is afraid that she is too late and the place she is ready to call her forever home has already been claimed. 

“Who are you?” the old woman asks, no malice in her voice. 

“Rey,” she answers. 

“Rey who?” the old woman implores. 

Rey hesitates, before this question had been easy. Just Rey, a scavenger from Jakku whose parents had left her behind, but now she did have a name.

Palpatine. The name still sends a chill through her bones, she can almost hear the dark cackle and see the dead face of her grandfather. Did she want his name? Did she want to accept him as family?

And then she seems them. 

They stand together, covered in a soft blue haze but beaming brighter than two suns in the sky. Her heart fills with love, hope, sadness and acceptance all at once and suddenly the answer is clear. 

“Rey Skywalker,” she replies and never have words been so easily spoken. 

The old woman simply nods before saying, “I saw you rummaging around the old huts this morning, I wanted to welcome you to Tatoonie. It has been so long since anyone has lived around in these parts,”

Rey thanks the woman and bids her farewell as the woman continues her journey across the barren land. 

That night she sits with BB-8 watching the suns set, she knows there is much to be done. She knows that this is her new home, knows that she was never destined for a life of teaching or politics. She is filled with hope, excited to build her own life for the first time, not one that was dealt to her in childhood or forced upon her by a war. 

She tries not to think of the hole in heart, the emptiness that threatens to over take her. Tries not to think of how happy he would have been to join her, even here in the most lifeless of planets. Tries not to remember how soft his eyes were and how wide his smile was. Tires not to think of how much love she felt in those fleeting moments. 

She knows she has to move on, she just didn’t know if she had the strength to do it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I have two more chapters on the way for tomorrow! I am all in the feels because of TROS. Please leave a comment and a like, I'm always wanting to connect with fellow readers! Sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes. Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed :)


	2. A Life Restarted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey starts to make her new life on Tatooine, though soon she realizes that she can not escape the outside world forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next chapter! Hope you all enjoy, sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes!

She quickly finds herself a life and routine on Tatooine. The first few days she spends repairing the huts, salvaging what she could, knowing that with time she would build what she could not. She creates herself a little home, filling it with the few knickknacks she took with her, knowing that while it will never truly feel like home it brings her the peace she desperately craves.

She decides to take up moisture farming, repairing the old machines and reading the few texts left behind by the previous owners. BB-8 helps her in setting up the farm and she beams with happiness by finally creating something for once instead of scavenging what was left behind.

At first, she does not seek out society, wanting to remain alone, until the old woman approaches her door one day asking if she would like to visit the outpost market with her.

“Oh, thank you but I have much work to do here today,”

“That is a shame because I heard the baker would be making a rare trip today,”

Rey could never say no to treats.

Soon the market becomes another escape, she walks the booths chatting with the locals and learning their stories, making sure to spend her abundance of credits on all their goods. She eventually starts to bring some of her harvested water, always giving it for free despite their protests. They insist that payment is always required for hard work but for Rey, their company and distraction are payment enough. Besides she has more credits than she knows what to do with thanks to the war payments Poe insisted on giving her.

Initially, she does not write or send holos to any of her friends despite her promises. She does not know what to say, does not know how to tell them everything is fine despite the constant ache in her heart that does not fade no matter how much farming, shopping or building she does. She also does not connect to the Force, uses her powers for nothing, knowing that by using it she would become more aware of the silence in her head.

The nights are the worst when there are no activities to keep her mind occupied. She cries then, cries for the loss of her family but especially for the loss of him. Begs whoever is out there to reconnect them, to see the face that for so long she feared. In the worst moments, she wishes that he had never sacrificed himself for her, that she remained with the Force. She immediately regrets it, knowing that Ben would want her to live, literally gave himself up for it. 

It is in those moments that she reaches out for the black fabric she had hidden in her bag, wraps herself up in it until a dreamless rest finds her.

She starts making tally marks again, old habits die hard, uses them to count the days as a way to keep herself somewhat grounded to the outside world.

It is three weeks in when the outside world bangs on her door.

She is surprised that it is Rose of all people who seek her out first.

“You haven’t written,” she says as a greeting, her look stern.

Rey looks down, shame overtaking her. She did not think her sudden silence would be heard.

“I-,” she starts but is unable to finish.

“Finn has been worried sick about you,” Rose says, though the tone is not accusatory, “It took all my willpower to prevent him from jumping on the first ship to here. You promised!”

“I-,” again the words fail her.

Rose’s gaze softens and she gives her a wry smile, “Well the least you can do is invite me in,”

They sit in the small kitchen and Rey quickly brings out her baked goods from the market, she never played hostess but knew that food was always a good start.

“So,” Rose finally says after what feels like an eternity, “What happened,”

“I’ve just been busy,” Rey starts, feeling the words leave her mouth like vomit, “The huts needed a lot of repairs and the farm takes a lot of work. I just forgot to write but I’m sorry. Please send Finn my apologies, I’ll write as soon as I can,”

Rose regards her again, “No, there is more to this. What happened Rey,”

Rey starts to cry, a good and proper cry.

“I miss them, I miss my family,”

“Oh Rey,” and suddenly she finds herself in a comforting hug, “I know, not a day goes by where I don’t remember my sister but Rey they would want us to live. You can’t cut yourself off from everyone. We’re your family too, no matter the blood in our veins,”

“I need them though, I need to be here” Rey knows Rose won’t connect the dots, won’t know that her loss runs straight to her core.

“Rey,” Rose says softly, like a mother Rey never had, “You don’t have to leave. Everyone heals in their own way and I know Finn and Poe don’t get it but I do. You need to leave it all behind to heal, but please don’t leave us behind too,”

Once again Rey knows that Rose is the true embodiment of hope, that it is people like Rose who will shine the light even when the world is dark. Though she knows that the pain her heart is not nearly starting to fade, she owes too much to her friends to cut them off like her force within.

Rose leaves with a basket of treats and a real promise to write.

That night she pens a letter to Poe and Finn, telling them of her new life. To Finn, she mentions how beautiful the Tatooine sunsets are and asks how he has been with the Force. To Poe, she tells him about all the interesting old pilot gear she found in the old rooms she can only assume were once Luke’s and tells him how BB-8 misses him.

As she seals the letters, she wonders if someday the ache would be gone. She thought about Rose, who had lost her sister, did Rose feel this soul-crushing ache as well? Did she feel as if half of her was gone?

Maybe it was because she for all purposes had died. Perhaps she would never feel complete again, a part of her soul would always be in the world that lies beyond. Yet, Rey knew that it was not true. That it was not because of her death a part of her soul went to the beyond. 

That night she hauls out the black robe again, surprised that its original smell is so strong despite the time passed. She doesn’t cry this time, instead just lies and breaths.

_ I wish I was not alone, again. _

As she returned to another night of dreamless sleep she could have sworn she heard softly in her head.

_ You aren’t alone. _

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed this chapter! I really did not love how little story Rose got in TROS so I'm fixing that and making her presence much larger here! I love Rose and think she is one of those characters who do really embody the message of "hope" and seeing the good even when things are bad as seen in TLJ. Anyways please leave a comment and like and thank you to all who have read so far! Again sorry for any mistakes!


	3. The Force Awakens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey gets another unwanted visitor and discovers that the Force is not always clear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next chapter! This one has been my favorite so far so I hope you all like it! Sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes! Thank you all for the support and love so far, thanks for reading!

A week later Rey is met with the surprise of a lifetime. 

It had been a long day, harvest time was near and there was much work to be done. She did not mind it though, the more work, the less time she had with her thoughts. 

She walks through the door of her hut when suddenly time stands still. The familiar spirit surrounded her, leading her to the kitchen. 

At her table sat Luke Skywalker admiring the paintings she had purchased from the local artist, sitting as if he was dropping by from next door and not from death. 

“Rey,” his bright blue form says, a large smile on his face. 

“Master Skywalker,” she stammers, her heart beating quickly in her chest. 

“Please, I think I am Luke now,” he says, and adding with a cheeky grin, “I mean apparently we are now family,”

“I-,” Rey did not know what to say. 

“I’m glad someone finally fixed this place up, it looks wonderful,” he says a look of nostalgia on his light blue face.

“What are you doing here?” Rey asks, wondering if he was even here, after all from her knowledge Force Ghosts only appeared in times of need and crisis. Perhaps she was finally losing her mind. 

“You summoned me here,” Luke responds simply, even in death he gave coy answers. 

“I didn’t,” Rey replies, she had not touched the Force in weeks. 

“Of course you did Rey,” Luke says, his face appeared younger, unburdened by the harshness of life, “You know what you want from me,”

Rey stared at him for a moment, he was not wrong. The question burned in her mind yearning to be asked, yet she was too afraid of the answer. 

“Come on Rey, ask,” Luke gently encourages. 

“Is- is he- is,” Rey stutters, the words difficult to force out, “Is he with you? Is he with the Force too? Did he become a-a…”

Luke closed his eyes and sighed, giving Rey the answer to her question but still he said, “I’m sorry Rey. We’ve been waiting, but he isn’t with us. He is not one with the Force,”

Rey closed her eyes to force back the tears, how could he not be with them? Even Darth Vader for kriff’s sake had become one with the Force! Her heart shattered at the realization that not even in the beyond would she see his face again. 

“Rey,” Luke began gently, sensing his former apprentice's despair, “Sometimes the Force works in mysterious ways. Sometimes these things take time. We just need to have hope,”

“Well the Force and I have not really been on speaking terms these days,” she lets out bitterly. 

“I know,” Luke says, his voice revealing his disappointment, “Rey why haven’t you been with open with the Force? Why have pushed us out of your spirit? Why have you closed yourself-”

“You know why!” Rey suddenly shouts, causing her former teacher to hover back in shock. 

“Rey, you know this isn’t what he would want,” Luke bluntly states, his tone reminded her of when they first met. 

“Well he’s dead and I am not. Does it really matter what he would have wanted,” she states, feeling like a child. 

“Perhaps the key to peace is within Rey,” Luke responds, choosing to ignore her comment, “I know the Force is not always kind and it is not always clear. But you must have hope Rey, even when it is not easy to find. Let the Force be with you,”

With that, he disappears, back to the beyond. Rey stands in anger, sadness and defeat. She wants to cry and scream at the same time. At this moment she hates the Force with a seething passion and wishes she were still an ordinary girl on Jakku scavenging for parts waiting for her parents to come. 

And just as the moment came it leaves, Rey takes a deep breath and lets down the wall that had been up since she climbed out of the dark hole on Exegol. 

The Force rushes back into her and around her, filling her senses with warmth and energy. She feels the Skywalker's signature, deeply embedded in the walls, call her and surround her like a blanket. She feels the soft and still energy of Tatooine soothe her broken soul. 

That evening she walks to the market, a barrel full of water for the locals. She walks through the booths when she spots a new woman, her stand decorated with various little relics and jewelry. 

“Hello,” the woman says, her smile strangely familiar.

Rey glances at the table, searching for something to add to her room’s decorations when she spots it. 

It’s small and translucent, easy to miss if it were not for its overwhelming call. Rey knows in that moment that it is hers, always has and always will be. 

“How much?” she asks. 

The woman smiles again, “Oh that, it’s a relic of my family’s. I have no use for it but you look like someone who can put it to use. For that reason I give it to you as a gift,”

Rey tries to protest, tries to push a small bag of credits into the woman’s hand but in the end she loses and is sent home with a kyber crystal in hand. 

As soon as she returns she dashes to the box of spare metals she had collected in her time on Tatooine, she ignores BB-8’s calls for sleep and lets her body go on autopilot. She’s surprised by how easy it comes together, Master Luke had told her how much struggle to forge a lightsaber is, yet the pieces come together quickly as if they craved being built more than she does. 

By dawn, she holds the saber hilt in one hand, in the other sits the crystal. She places it carefully inside the hilt before bringing the whole thing to her lips. 

She closes her eyes and breaths, willing the saber to come to life. Wills the Force to be with her, even if she is not always happy with it. And then she thinks of her friends, of Master Luke’s laugh, of Leia’s warm smile, of Ben’s soft dark eyes.

The saber roars to life, a warm yellow shine emerging and Rey knows then that even if she doesn't want it, the Force will be with her always. 

When she finally lays down, her body screaming for rest, she dreams.

She is standing in a garden, green and full of life and beauty. Every inch of it calls to her. 

_Rey_. 

She spots him, tall and full of life. 

“Ben!” she calls out, her voice echoing around her. Her heart is racing. 

He spins around and runs to her, picking her up before firmly pressing her to his chest.

“Rey!” he says, breathless, “You're here, you found me!”

“What is this?” she asks, her mind racing a million thoughts per second, “Is this real? Are you real? Are you alive?”

He ignores her questions and instead buries his face in the crook of her neck breathing her in as if she is oxygen.

“You're here, you're safe,” he says finally, pulling back to look her in the eyes. His smile is so wide, it hurts. 

“Ben, please,” she says, her voice small, “What is this? Are you alive?”

“I don’t know,” he admits and somehow Rey knows that this is not a dream. 

“Where are you? What happened?” she asks.

He doesn’t answer, maybe he can’t, instead he kisses her softly. Her insides instantly become warm, her soul feels whole. 

He keeps kissing her, gently and full of love, peppering her face with little kisses from her nose to the freckles under her eyes to her forehead. Each kiss makes her feel lighter, makes the pain go away. 

“You’re so beautiful Rey, so full of light, so strong,” he babbles between kisses. She wants to keep pressing for answers but instead she just grips him tightly thinking that if her grip is so strong he can never let go. 

He then kisses her shoulder, kisses the scar on her arm and bruises left from the battle that still have not healed. 

“I love you,” Rey finally chokes out. 

He looks at her face again, his smile burns brighter than the twin suns.

He kisses her again, deep and full of love. 

“I love you so much Rey,”

He then drops to his knees and with a look full of admiration and love gently kisses her stomach much to Rey’s surprise. 

“I love you so so much,” he says again, before standing up and looking her in the eyes. 

“Ben, what is this? Are you here? Are you real?”

He looks at sadly before kissing her again and saying, “Rey I don’t know what has happened to me if we will meet again but promise you will be strong,”

“Ben, you can’t leave me. I can’t be alone again,” she says, with tears in her eyes. 

“I’ll never leave you, Rey,” he says with conviction, “I’ll always be with you. You must be strong my love, you must fight,”

She has so much she wants to say, to find out what has happened, but she starts to feel their surroundings fade away signaling that their time is over. 

“No! Ben, please, tell me how to find you again,”

It’s too late though, the world begins to disappear and the last thing she hears is _Rey I love you, promise me to be strong, you will never be alone again_ and then she is back in her bed in the Skywalker hut on Tatooine. 

She jumps out of bed quickly and throws up in the small wastebasket. She feels sick to her stomach. 

What has happened to her? To her Ben? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's Ben! I wonder what has happened to him? It was so sweet and heartbreaking to write that scene, poor Rey! Also I wish a happy and safe holiday to those of you that celebrate! Please leave a like and comment, thanks again for reading and sorry for any mistakes!


	4. The Rage Within

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey comes to terms with her life and the hardships she's faced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DISCLAIMER: This chapter deals and discusses some aspects of mental health (such as despair, anger, life/death, etc.), there is nothing too extreme or dark/deep but I just wanted to let you all know in case some of you are sensitive to such topics and may opt to skip this chapter :)
> 
> Here is the next chapter! It is a bit shorter and focuses more on Rey's inner journey than the plot but it is an important one for her. Thank you all for the overwhelming support (it means so much to me!) and thank you for all the love. Sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes! Please leave a like and comment and thank you so much for reading!

Her room is suddenly far too small, and she can’t breathe. She dashes out, noticing night has fallen once again, she runs with no destination in mind letting her feet carry her through the desert.

What was that? Was it real? What happened to Ben?

A sandstorm is going on, but Rey couldn’t care less, she is scared and knows she needs to be somewhere where the Skywalker spirit can not reach her. The Force is shut out, once again she rejects it in fear and anger.

Eventually, her legs give out, her strength not yet fully recovered to what it was before her death, and she collapses on her knees into the harsh sand. She cannot see, only can feel the whirls of sand surrounding her body.

“Why!” she screams, finally giving in to the anger held at bay for so long, “Why do you punish me like this! Punish them! Nobody has defended the Force as they have, as I have!”

She knows she is screaming into the void. Screaming to an entity that cannot scream back, but she is far too gone to care.

“Is it not enough that I’ve lost them! Lost him! Must you torture me with visions of what I will never have!”

The storm intensifies, the wind whipping roughly against her face. She can feel her lungs burn as the air becomes less oxygen and more sand. She doesn’t care, does not mind if this is her end, the Force must know her rage.

“I gave everything to you! My parents, my family, my life, my love! Is it not enough!”

She keeps screaming until her vision becomes blurry and the pounding in her head becomes too strong and then everything becomes black and the last thing she feels is her head hitting the ground with a hard thud.

-

The world is far too bright when Rey finally opens her eyes, at first she worries she got what she asked for and is dead again. Worried she has truly failed Ben and his sacrifice was all for naught.

And then she hears a voice and knows that she is very much alive.

“Hand me another washcloth, dear,”

The old woman’s face comes into view, filling Rey with relief. She was alive, it wasn't too late.

“Where am I?” she croaks out, her voice hoarse and brittle. There is a strong pounding in her head, and she feels weak.

“Sssh,” the old woman commands, placing a cool cloth on her head, “You have caused quite a commotion, my dear, I thank the Force we found you in time,”

Rey winces at the mention of the Force, recalling her anger.

“I’m sorry,” she weakly says, knowing that it is not just the old woman she is apologizing to.

“I know,” the woman replied, “I’m just glad your little droid found me and thankful that your screams are loud,”

Rey feels shame blossom in her chest, how could she frighten BB-8 like that. Suddenly she feels like a child again, foolish and so unaware of the consequences of her actions.

“Rest,” the old woman whispers before Rey can open her mouth again, “Your body has been through a lot, there will be time to speak later,”

When she comes to the pounding in her head is gone, her lungs are no longer burning and her vision is clear. The old woman sits in a chair beside her, a cup of tea in her hand.

“I’m-”

“Save it,” the old woman says and Rey wonders, if this is what having a grandmother, would feel like, “Let us eat first, my granddaughters baked us bread,”

Rey's heart leaps at the woman's generosity and again shame overtakes her. She was willing to throw her life away, a life so many people had died for, all because she had been angry.

_ Some strong woman I am. _

The old woman helps her up and together they walk into the parlor where two young girls with matching blonde pigtails offer them a small tray of buns. Rey sits and quickly eats her bun, her body starved for food.

“Do you like the buns Miss Skywalker,” one of them asks shyly with a toothy grin.

“Very much so,” Rey replies with a true smile.

Afterward, they sit in silence while the old woman’s granddaughters run around the room, laughing in delight as they play.

“For the Resistance!” they scream, recreating the battles they no doubt have heard about.

Rey feels a stab in her chest, she thinks of how much she would have loved a child, Ben’s child. On Jakku she never considered children, after all, she could barely survive herself. With the Resistance, she never thought beyond the next day, but now she realizes how much she would have loved to raise dark-haired children that would have had their father’s smile and her resilience.

“Their parents work on the large moisture farm up north,” the old woman says, noticing Rey’s glance, “I take care of them during the harvest season, they are such sweet girls,”

“They are,” Rey agrees.

The old woman takes her hand suddenly but Rey welcomes the touch.

“My child, you are not the first woman I have found raving in the desert when the pain of loss becomes too much to bear. I do not know your story but I know that you must pick yourself up, child. You must be strong, especially  _ now _ ,”

Rey does not miss the emphasis at the end but before she can inquire, BB-8 appears at the doorway asking if she was alright.

“Miss Skywalker is more than alright,” the old woman answers helping Rey stand up before pulling her into a hug, “Rey, know that you are stronger than you think and that all you seek is already in you,”

Rey sits on her cot that night, recalling the events of the day. Thinks of how foolish she was to run into the storm, how foolish she was to not care if she died.

_ Promise me you will be strong. _

“I will,” she says quietly, knowing that she has to start healing, “I will be strong for you, I will live for you. I’m sorry,”

The next morning she writes to her friends inviting them for dinner before the harvest is in full swing. She instantly receives a reply from Finn asking if next week was too early and Rey laughs knowing that even tomorrow wouldn’t have been too early when it came to them.

She sets off to the market, hoping to find gifts for her friends feeling for the first time in forever a renewed vigor in her. As if the light she hadn’t felt for so long was suddenly blooming within her again.

Little did she know at that moment of what was to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of things that kind of annoyed me in this trilogy is Rey never really dealing with all the things she's gone through especially in TROS (her parents, the death of her adoptive family (Han, Leia and Luke), Ben's sacrifice or her childhood) so in this story one of her bigger journeys is going to be her realistically dealing with the hardships of her life.  
> Again thank you all so much for reading, hope you all enjoyed this chapter! It was one of the harder ones to write because I wanted it to be realistic to what Rey would be feeling. Sorry again for any writing mistakes! Thanks for reading :)


	5. The Force is With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey finds hope in the most unlikely of ways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next chapter! It is a bit longer but one of my favorite ones so far! I hope you all enjoy this chapter and thank you for all the support you guys have given, it means so much to me! Sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes! Enjoy :)

Over the next few days, life falls into a peaceful lull for Rey. She no longer feels as if she was about to shatter at any moment and finds herself smiling more often, taking pleasure in life’s simplest moments. 

Her demons do not entirely leave her, some nights she still cries herself to sleep, desperately clutching the black fabric. Some mornings she’ll wake up unmotivated, angry and sad wanting to do nothing but scream and wail. 

On those days she visits the old woman who becomes not just a friend, but someone she can trust with the Rey who has flaws. The Rey who was not a perfect, pure of heart Jedi and Resistance hero but the Rey who has Palpatine blood in her veins and darkness in her heart. The old woman accepts  _ that  _ Rey with open arms and guides her back to the light in a way that only one person could.

She still holds the Force at bay, scared from her last interaction with it. 

_ Let the past die.  _

She ironically finds logic in the mantra she once loathed, reasoning that perhaps the Force and all its powers were a part of a past she no longer wanted to live in. The galaxy was safe, the darkness defeated, Rey the Jedi was no longer needed. Rey Skywalker just wanted to be a moisture farmer who loved to fix droids and be with her friends. 

Finn, Rose and Poe visit causing Rey to temporarily forget about her struggles. She prepares for them a grand feast, one they exclaim is way too much but for Rey, nothing is ever too much for her friends. 

“So how has everything been?” she asks, starved for information about the outside world. Her time on Tatooine had made her feel as if she were in a whole other galaxy. 

They tell her about the peace efforts, how tiring the politics of building a new government are and how much joy they get from helping the war-torn planets and people heal. 

“There are so many people like me, Rey,” Finn says his grin so wide, “So many stormtroopers who were taken from their families that now have a chance to truly live their own life,”

Rey listens with intense interest as Rose shares with her how she’s been chosen to help draft the new government, about the ins and outs of politics. She laughs as Poe tells her about all his adventures in helping the Resistance make peace treaties with various planets and feels proud when he shares with her his plans to open a pilot school for young fighters. 

“I hope there will be no more wars,” Poe says earnestly, “But the galaxy can always use good pilots besides I know nobody wants me in politics!”

She asks Finn how his journey with the Force has been.

“It’s been good,” he says, before admitting with a bit of hesitation, “I’ve actually been offered to learn from a bunch of these old scholars who have connections with the Force but instead of becoming Jedi they chose to study more about the Force and how it all works,”

“That’s great!” Rey says, glad that at least someone in the galaxy still wanted to be with the Force. 

“I’ll be gone for a year though,” he says, a look of sadness appearing on his face. 

“I’ll miss you so much,” Rey says before grabbing his hand to squeeze it, “But I know that whatever they have to teach you will be very important,”

Then the conversation shifts to her and Rey tells them a heavily edited version of her life Tatooine. She tells them about the bustling market, the hard work on the farm but leaves out all her struggles. 

“What about your Force journey?” Finn asks, “How has it been being a Jedi?”

Rey bites her lip, not knowing what exactly to tell him. 

And then she’s dashing to the sink to throw up. 

Dread filled her stomach, it was the third time that day. Ever since the night in the desert, the sickness in her tummy had not left her. At first, she thought it had just been the stress her body and mind had been going through but now she was beginning to fear it was something more. 

“Rey! Are you okay?” a concerned Finn shouts, helping her up from her position over the sink. 

“I’m fine,” Rey replies, disappointed that she’s worried her friends again. 

They fret a bit more over her, Finn asking her again if she was alright. She knows they can not help it, knows they worry about her more than they try to let on. 

“I’m really fine,” she insists to Finn one more time as they say goodbye, sure that the sickness is just the lingering result of her chaotic lifestyle of late. 

“Don’t hesitate to call if you’re not,” Finn says as he pulls her into a tight hug, “I will drop everything and come, you’re my best friend Rey,”

“I know,” she replies, “Thank you, Finn, but I know I’m fine,”

-

She was not fine. 

Rey slumped against the wastebasket, cringing as felt her lunch leave her stomach. It was the fifth time today she found herself in this position, her most common one these days. 

She sighs, wondering if it was worth it to go eat a bun or if it would just prompt another round of hurling. Lately any food she ate just reappeared hours later.

“Still sick!” comes the mechanical screech of D-O who Poe had dropped off a few days after their dinner. 

_ “Figured BB-8 could use the company, besides I don’t think he likes us very much,” _

“Yes,” Rey sighs under her breath, “Still sick,”

She wondered for a moment if she is dying if Ben’s sacrifice had only bought her two months of extra time and now the Force was ready to collect what it rightfully had already taken. Another part of her wonders if the Force is just punishing her for icing it out. 

_ Promise me you will be strong.  _

She knows she has to stop acting like a child, that perhaps for once the Force will give her the answers she seeks. 

It was difficult to find high ground on Tatooine, yet the small but rocky cliffs she stumbled upon would do. She finds a boulder and in instinct sits upon it crossed-legged and closes her eyes. 

The Force rushes into her, just as it had before, it surrounds her with warmth and comfort. She feels the soft light of Tatooine wrap around her guiding her into serenity. 

She takes a deep breath and begins to focus. 

_Tell me what I seek to know._

At first, nothing changes and all Rey can feel is the hot presence of Tatooine still clinging around her like a moth to the flame. She feels her heart sink, perhaps her troubles did not lay in the Force, that she was truly sick and dying. 

Suddenly, the air shifts and the soft warmth of Tatooine is replaced with something hauntingly familiar. 

Ben. 

She knows his signature like she knows how to breathe, it is instinctive and rooted somewhere deep within her soul. It calls to her, the signature a crackly red with a bright core. She follows it, puzzled how his signature can be so strong or even present when he was in the world beyond. 

_Maybe it’s his ghost?_

Then something odd takes place and signature begins to shift, the rough edges of Ben’s fading away to become her soft blue that flickered with insecurity. Her signature surrounds her, confusing Rey to no end. 

_How did the signature shift?_

The signature keeps shifting back and forth, switching from her own to Ben’s as the sky turns from day to night. Rey feels her frustration begin to grow. 

_What does this have to do with anything?_

And then it all becomes clear. 

The world around her falls to silence as the signature morphs into something Rey does not recognize. Ben’s crackly red and her soft blue merge to create a calm but powerful purple signature. 

_Where is it coming from?_

She follows the signature, wanting to capture it and find its source yet no matter how much she reaches she cannot find where it is. It is almost as if it is not apart of the outside world. 

_But how can that be?_

Suddenly her vision is flooded and she is back in the jungles of Ajan Kloss where she finds Leia, her appearance younger with her hair a rich dark brown color and a white long gown instead of a uniform. 

“Rey,” she beckons, her voice sweet.

Leia grabs her hands and gives her a soft smile, “Rey you have always been my greatest hope, and now I am glad to help you find yours,”

Leia glances their joined hands and moves them gently placing them firmly against her stomach. 

“May the Force be with you,” she says lovingly, “Always,”

Rey feels it then, that the signature is rooted deeply within her, small but overwhelmingly strong. 

It’s bright and calming full of hope, potential and most of all love. 

It is the signature of her child. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leia! Leia is one of my favorite Star Wars characters (besides Ben and Rey) and I love writing her character. Also looks like Rey has a lot more answers to go find! Thank you all for reading and please leave a like and comment, the support and love have really meant a lot to me! Also, Happy New Year's to you guys, hope your year is filled with happiness and success! Sorry again for any spelling or grammar mistakes and hoped you all enjoyed :)


	6. The Happiest Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey looks for answers but gets more than she expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry all for the long wait, between the holidays I wasn't able to write and edit as much! To make it up this chapter is a bit longer than most of the ones I've done so far but starting from here the plot is really going to start taking off. Thank you so much for the kind and wonderful comments, especially in a time where it seems like the Star Wars fandom has gotten a bit hectic. I hope you all like this chapter, it was one of the harder ones to write. As always sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes! Enjoy!

It takes all her will not to fall off the boulder. The shock runs through her body like a lightning bolt. She stands up, legs shaky, and starts running. 

_How?_

Despite her lack of childhood education, she knew how children were made. She remembered how the women would gossip as they cleaned their finds, talking about the men they had met and the children those unions created. She cringed remembering when she occasionally stumbled upon a couple with no shame or worse a cantina full of women with little clothing swaying their hips for whoever had enough credits.

Rey was always too focused on surviving and waiting for her family to have any affairs. Whenever any man would look her way she would simply ignore them or in extremer cases _show_ them she was not interested. She had heard enough love stories gone wrong to even risk the chance of having her heart broken or worse.

_So how?_

It was clear the child was Ben’s, but how was what broke her head. After all, she had only ever kissed him, in the short sweet moment before he went to the world beyond.

She kept running until she found herself at the old woman's hut. The door had been left open which Rey took as a sign to let herself in, manners were not her main concern at the moment.

She sits and breathes, her mind in a galaxy far, far away.

“Ah I see you figured it out,” the old woman’s voice breaks her trance.

“You _knew_?” she says incredulously, no shame in being caught uninvited.

“I suspected,” the old woman responds simply, not taking note of Rey’s tone, “After all, when you have lived as long as I, life’s mysteries start to become predictable,”

“And you didn’t tell me,” Rey says icily.

“In my defense, I had found you raving in the desert, I wasn’t sure how you would respond to the news of motherhood,” the old woman responds, a slight edge in her voice that instantly cools Rey’s temper.

“I’m sorry,” Rey says quietly, remembering how every time she had found herself in this hut she had been in some state of distress.

“I shouldn’t have kept it to myself for so long,” the old woman admits apologetically, “So how are you feeling?”

Rey stares at her for a moment processing the question. How was she feeling? In all her shock and confusion she hadn’t even thought about the main fact.

_I’m going to be a mother._

Rey knew it should frighten her, motherhood. After all, she never had a mother and came from a less than stellar lineage. She could barely handle herself these days and now she was going to be the sole caretaker of another human. She should be terrified.

Yet, all she could find in herself, besides confusion, was an overwhelming sense of joy. The knowledge that after all the death and despair she had dealt with she was now going to create something full of light and hope. Someday, someone with her and Ben’s features was going to look at her with such innocence and call her _mom_.

_ I’m not alone anymore. _

“I feel wonderful,” Rey says out loud, “I don’t know the first thing about being a mother, but I know I want to learn everything there is to,”

The old woman smiles, “Well, you can start by taking care of yourself,”

Rey is reminded of her sickness, “Yes, I haven’t been able to eat much lately,”

The old woman walks into the kitchen before returning with two tiny bottles.

“I work as a healer in these parts for those who can’t afford the journey to the main village,” she explains, as she hands Rey the bottles, “This is an old recipe for the sickness you have, drink it every morning until it passes. The other bottle is for your child, drink it every morning and visit me often,”

“Thank you,” Rey says surprised she never even knew what the old woman did for a living. She still had so much to learn. 

“Take care Rey,” the old woman says, drawing her into a comforting hug, “You are going to be a wonderful mother,”

-

Rey walks back to her hut, feeling a lightness she hadn’t felt in a while. The purple sunsets of Tatooine complimented her dreamy mood.

_I hope you can sense it too._

When she arrives back home she finds BB-8 and D-O already plugged in for the night, she smiles and places the bottles in one of her empty cabinets.

She lays down on her cot and her hand wanders to her still flat tummy. She closes her eyes and quickly finds the soft signature of her child. Her heart fills with joy, and she knows she has never felt happier.

Yet, she also had never felt so confused.

“How?” she asks softly, and then she feels it.

She is not alone.

She bolts up in her bed, ready to attack when she notices the bright blue figure sitting on the chair across from her bed staring out the window. 

“Who are you?” Rey asks, her eyes flickering over to her lightsaber, she did not recognize this woman. Could Forst Ghosts be harmful?

“Someone who is a lot like you,” the woman replies before turning to face Rey.

The woman’s face is stern but compassionate, hardened by years of no doubt a tough life. Rey notices a familiarity in her looks and signature but can’t quite place it.

“Are you a Jedi?” Rey asks.

“No,” the woman says with a shake of her head, “Though my family is strong with the Force,”

Rey stares at her for a moment, making sense of the woman’s words, and a memory comes to her. A memory that is not quite hers.

_ There was no father.  _

_ Only the Force. _

“You’re Darth Vader’s mother,” Rey states, the urban legends of her childhood coming back to haunt her, “He had no father, they said he only had a mother,”

“Yes, Anakin was my son,” the woman says a flicker of sadness crosses her face, “I never could explain what happened, only that one day I was blessed with him. They told me it must have been the Force but I never understood,”

Rey’s heart seizes up with fright, Darth Vader had no father. He was a monster. Would her child become a monster too? Was this the Force’s ultimate punishment for her?

Sensing her rising fear the woman spoke again, “What happened to my son was a tragedy, but I do not think the Force wished to give a poor slave girl a child just to break her heart. I didn’t even know what the Force was when I gave birth to Anakin,”

“Then why would the Force do such a thing?” Rey asks, her anxiety not lessening despite the comforting words.

“I don’t know why the Force does it what it does,” the woman, Shmi Skywalker another memory assists, admits, “I choose to believe that the Force wanted to give me hope, something to fight and live for,”

_You’re never going to be alone again._

“Besides,” Shmi continues, “Your child does have a father,”

“Not a father they can meet,”

“But one that can watch over them,” Shmi says, and before Rey can ask more questions she’s gone.

Her hand wanders to her tummy again, a fear now equal to her joy. She would do anything for this child, make sure that whatever forces lied behind its creation would not harm it.

That night she lays in bed and wonders if the Force would help her, would be kind to her even if they don’t always see eye to eye.

“ _Tell me what I need to know,_ ” she thinks before sleep overtakes her.

-

She’s on the Falcon.

She sees Leia and Luke, sitting together. They both appear younger, more like pictures Rey had seen in the old holos.

“The med droid says it’s going to be a boy,” Leia speaks, her hand lovingly caressing the small bump that Rey was now just noticing. 

“Oh Leia that’s wonderful,” Luke exclaims, his grin so boyish and giddy, “Oh man, I can’t wait to meet him!”

A wind overtakes her and now she’s in a small room, furnished only with a cradle and some chests. Chewie and Han are standing near the cradle, a small white bundle in Chewie’s arms.

“Isn’t he tiny,” Han asks with a laugh, “Except those ears, I don’t know where he got those ears!”

Then they’re gone and it’s night. The atmosphere changes to something sinister, almost like Pal-

She hears the bone-chilling laugh that fills the room causing the baby to cry.

_ Young Solo, you will be mine. _

She tumbles and finds herself on Ach-Too but it looks different.

And it's on fire.

“I didn’t want this!” a young boy cries out, it’s Ben.

The Jedi did.

Rey tries to move, but her feet stayed planted to the ground and the flames consume her.

Her vision clears, and she’s back in the dark trenches of Exegol. A hooded figure stands among the ruins and her blood runs cold.

“The Emperor is dead,” a voice comes from the shadows, “The Sith have been destroyed, I soon will perish as well. The young Palpatine has betrayed her blood,”

“The Emperor was foolish to believe she would ever embrace him,” the hooded figure says, “And now all is lost,”

“No, my boy,” the voice says becoming fainter with each word, “The Emperor did not know what I know. Go, find my journals, follow what they say,”

“This is not the time for your theories! The First Order is dead, the Jedi has won, all our plans are finished!”

“Our plans are just beginning, while we will all die, you will live. My boy, leave this place and find my journals. There will be another, I am sensing it even now as my breaths become shallow. One day there will be one much stronger than I, than the Jedi or her grandfather. One who will betray their family just as she betrayed hers',”

_No. It can't be. They can't mean._

“Follow my words and work in the shadows. Someday, they will find you, and together you both will achieve all the Emperor wanted and more,”

Rey charges, ready to strike the figure dead, but before she can the cave begins to tremble and lighting strikes. As it all collapses she is flung back, screaming.

She finds herself in someone’s arms.

“Rey!”

_Ben!_

“They’re going to hurt our baby!” she screams, trying to escape Ben’s arms and fight whatever stood in the cave. She would not let the darkness survive. 

He doesn’t let her, instead, he buries her in his shoulder and strokes her hair.

“I won’t let them,” he promises.

She’s fading again.

“Ben!”

“I’ll protect you!”

_I’ll protect you both._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhangers for days! Also, I just love writing flashbacks/force visions, it's so much fun! What I'm hoping to do with this story is really create almost an "Episode 10" and I am so excited for you all to see where Rey's journey takes her as well as some fun original characters I've been working on for this story. I hope you all liked this chapter, please leave a like and I would love to hear all your thoughts/predictions in the comments! Hopefully, the next update will come out much quicker, I feel bad that this one took so long! As always sorry for any mistakes and thank you all so much for reading :)


	7. The Afterlife

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The afterlife isn't all it appears to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next chapter, with a new POV! Thank you all for the support and love for this story, it really inspires me to keep writing and working on fun ideas and plot points for you all! I hope you all love this chapter, it was a really fun one to write. Sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes! Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy!

Ben Solo did not deserve to live.

This had been the only thought in his mind when he emerged from the pit; though years under Snoke’s training had given him the knowledge on how to save himself, it was only through an undeserving grace that he was alive.

No. No. No.

This was the thought that accompanied the freezing of his blood at the sight of Rey lifeless among the rubble. The thought that roared as he picked up her small body, realizing that the beautiful light had gone out.

Rey deserved to live.

That thought had been quick and easy, she deserved the world. Ben knew from the moment they locked eyes on the snowy cliffs of Starkiller Base that he could never kill her, that no matter what she would live.

Ben Solo did not deserve to live.

He had held her close, crushed to find not even a glimmer of life. He pleaded silently, hoping against hope that someone would help them.

Then he remembers his encounter with death, how she healed him.

Could he? Could the Force give him this even though he was most undeserving?

“ _ I know I deserve nothing, _ ” he speaks silently to the Force, “ _ But she deserves to live, she is the light this galaxy needs. Do this for her, _ ”

Breathe. Just breathe.

This was the mantra flowing through him as willed his life force, frail but present into hers.

When he felt the grasp of her hand, all thoughts ceased. All he could focus on was the flush of life in her face and her signature brightly surrounding him. She was alive.

You are everything.

That had been in his head as he gazed upon her, knowing that he was running out of time. He took in her face one last time, so sweet and full of light.

I love you.

That had been what he tried to convey from the moment she pressed her lips against his, trying to pour in all the words and emotions he would never get to tell her.

When his body finally gave out, as he felt himself slip into whatever lay ahead all he could think of in his final moments was-

Please don’t let her be alone.

-

Ben didn’t know what he expected death to be like; for all his darkness, death was not a topic he had considered often. As a young child, he had heard the stories of how all the powerful Jedi become ghosts, remembered listening in awe as Luke had told him about Obi-Wan, Yoda, and his grandfather.

“And someday Ben, when our time here is done we too will become one with the Force,”

Do Supreme Leaders get to become ghosts too?

He was surprised to find how similar being dead was to being alive. Surprised to find his eyes opening and his lungs expanding with air.

Surprised he was in a garden.

It was a beautiful place, unlike anything he had ever seen in his lifetime. It was green and full of colorful flowers with a large tree standing in the center. In the corner of his eye, he could spot a lake.

_ Where I am? _

There was no other presence in the garden, physical or through the Force. He was surprised though at how strongly the Force flowed through the place, almost as if it belonged here.

He wants to explore more, but he feels sleepy again, and he falls back into the darkness.

Life carries on like that for what feels like a long time, though Ben can not tell since there is no day cycle. In fact, there aren't any indications that this is a place that works as normal places did. He finds no other ghosts, no sign of his mother or uncle, nor is he pulled back to the world as a spirit. He also hears no voices in his head, only his own thoughts.

For the first time in his existence, he’s alone.

He sleeps a lot, can only explore the garden for a bit before his body gives out, and he collapses. He dreams then, and the dreams are the strangest he’s ever had. He sees people he’s never met, watches them going through life. They are usually in crisis and Ben feels the need to help them even though they most likely aren’t real or even if they are, they certainly can’t hear him. Yet, Ben vowed the moment he turned that he would forever try to make up for all the pain he caused, a promise that applied even to the afterlife.

One day, or maybe one eon later who knows, he spots her.

She looks the same as she did in his arms, and he feels his heart soars. They reunite and he feels complete. Yet, something is off. Her signature is all different, she doesn’t feel as solid as everything else does, and before he knows it she’s gone.

He doesn’t give it much thought, thinks it’s just another weird aspect of whatever version of the afterlife he’s been assigned to.

He gives it thought when she’s flung into his arms screaming about a baby.  _ Their _ baby. Despite not understanding a word of what she’s saying, he comforts her because his life purpose will always be to protect Rey, and then she is gone again.

He sleeps for a long time after that.

When he awakes he knows something is different.

“Kid, wake up,”

It’s Luke, but he looks solid without any trace of blue.

“Uncle?” he asks, and feels like a padawan again, confused and slightly terrified, “What’s going on? Where am I? Is this the afterlife?”

“Always asking so many questions,” he says with a grin, “Come, sit, we don’t have much time,”

“Why?” he asks, his childhood trait of curiosity on full display again, “We’re dead. Don’t we have all the time in the world?”

Luke doesn’t answer, choosing to ignore him, “Ben, I need to tell you something. It’s about Rey,”

“Is she alright?” he asks panicked, remembering how she screamed in his arms.

“She’s fine,” Luke assures before adding slowly, “They both are,”

“So it’s true then, Rey is with child? My child?” he asks, wondering how it is even possible.

“Yes,” Luke confirms.

Ben doesn’t even ask, he knows the story of his grandfather, He knows the Force worked in ways nobody would ever understand.

“It seems the Skywalkers will live on after all,” Luke says in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“Yes,” Ben agrees, “And so will our legacy,”

Luke looks down and Ben knows that he understands. Knows that the legacy of the Skywalkers is two, one of the galaxy's greatest heroes: Princess Leia and Luke Skywalker and the other of its greatest evils: Darth Vader and Kylo Ren.

No wonder Rey is terrified.

He is too, suddenly realizing that there was going to be another powerful but helpless child to be used as a pawn in a game. Would his child be manipulated, grow up with voices in their head?

_ No. _

“Ben, we have done all that we can do,” Luke says, “We have to hope that the darkness is defeated, that they will be safe,”

“You didn’t come here to comfort me,”

“Something is off with the Force,” Luke admits, “I don’t know what, but something has shifted. I can barely sense it anymore. It took me forever to even find you, and I have a feeling I won’t ever find you again so listen carefully, Ben. You must stay strong, do not let your emotions control you. Work with the Force, let it guide you. I can’t see what will happen or what is happening, only that your strength is necessary,’

“I won’t let anything hurt Rey,” he promises, though by the frown on Luke’s face he can tell that’s not what he meant.

“Oh, and Ben,” Luke says, a sad smile on his face, “I’m sorry and I forgive you,”

“You shouldn’t. I don’t deserve it,”

“I know but I do,” Luke replies and not for the first time does Ben desperately wish that things could have been different, “Ben, I love you. We all did. I’m sorry we couldn’t help you, but know that I will do everything I can for them.”

“Uncle,” he says, knowing that Luke’s time here is over, “If you see my mother, tell her I love her and I’m sorry. Tell her I hope someday she can even think to forgive me,”

“Oh Ben,” Luke says as he starts fading away, “She already has,”

_ May the Force be with You. _

And then he’s gone.

Ben looks around the garden and for the first time fights the will to sleep.

He had some exploring to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ben! It was so much fun to write from Ben's POV as so far it's just been Rey's. While we don't see much of "Ben Solo" in TROS he is by far my favorite character, he was just so cool! I was really bummed we didn't get resolution on the Luke/Ben conflict in TROS so I decided to add it in here since their history was one of the most fascinating aspects of the ST for me. Thank you all again for reading and all the love! Please leave a like and leave a comment, I love reading them! Sorry again for any mistakes. Hope you all enjoyed and thanks for reading :)


	8. Back to Where?!?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some old friends make Rey get out of the house!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all! Sorry for the delay in updates, I've gone back to school so it's been harder to find time to write and edit but I promise I still very much love this story and will be updating it as much as I can! I actually have a draft of the next chapter already written so hopefully that will be coming soon as well! Thank you all for the love and support, it really means so much! Hope you all enjoy this chapter. Sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes! Thanks for reading :)

Rey had always prided herself on her rationality.

After all, it had been her best survival tool on Jakku, her ability to not let her emotions get the best of her. To separate her feelings about her harsh life from the realities of it.

She missed it.

Lately, her days had been spent all the same; obsessively rereading the Jedi texts in the hopes of finding any answers. Her visions haunted her, creating a need to defeat a darkness she did not even understand.

She's sprawled out on the floor again, surrounded by all of Luke’s journals, she groans in frustration. The journals held nothing she did not already know. She hears a knock at the door but ignores it, not in the mood for visitors.

Then her door flies open. She hears the harsh roar of Chewie.

“Chewbacca! You can’t just bust down a door, hasn’t anyone ever taught you proper protocol?” comes the panicked voice of C-3PO.

“Chewie? 3PO? What are you doing here?” Rey asks, unsettled by the sudden visit. She subtly moves her robe around her, slightly covering her small bump.

Chewie roars, ignoring C-3PO’s fussing.

“Poe sent you?” Rey asks, “He thought I wasn’t doing well? What gave him that idea?”

Chewie shrugs and roars again half-heartedly.

“Well, maybe I have taken an interest in state affairs?” Rey replies, she should have known her daily check-ins with Poe and Rose about the state of the galaxy would have aroused their suspicions.

“Well, as you can see, I’m perfectly fine, just reading,” Rey says quickly, hoping they will be satisfied with their check-up and leave.

“Just as I said she was,” C-3P0 says pointedly, “I told Commander Dameron what a waste of time this would be, Mistress Rey clearly has just been devoting herself to the acquisition of knowledge!”

Chewie glares at her and Rey feels herself sink into the floor. After Exegol they had become close, both joining each other in mourning the only family they have ever had. He roars softly, asking if they could at least get a hug.

She bites the inside of her mouth, knowing that standing would quickly give away her condition. Then she realizes she won’t be able to hide her child from the world forever and refusing a hug would only worry them more. She takes a deep breath and stands up, feeling her robes softly settle around her tummy.

Chewie roars in confusion and C-3PO’s eyes brighten in shock.

“Surprise?” she says with a weak smile.

“Mistress Rey, you are with child!” 3P0 squeaks out. Chewie stares at her, and she can feel all his questions.

She considers for a moment if she should tell him about Ben and their bond, how he saved her and how her baby is his, but she chickens out, saying instead, “I don’t know-how, it is something with the Force. That’s why I’ve been so obsessive,”

The look Chewie gives her makes her feel as though he does not quite believe her, but he does not press further, only offering a comforting roar and pulling her into a tight hug.

“You can’t stay here! Not in your condition, this place is filthy and full of scoundrels! Mistress Rey, you must return with us to the New Capital!” C-3P0 insists, Rey knows her news has sent him into overdrive.

Rey opens her mouth, ready to refuse before she pauses. Her time on Tatooine had not brought her any answers, perhaps the knowledge she sought was somewhere else?

_ I came here to the First Jedi Temple. _

Of course!

“I can’t go to the New Capital, there is so much work to be done and I would only be a distraction,” Rey says, but before C-3PO can protest, “But, I need to go to Ahch-To for some unfinished business. I know you all must be busy but it wouldn’t take long,”

She’s on the Falcon faster than she can move. She should have known Chewie would never say no to her.

_ You have to protect the princess for me. _

She sits quietly on the Falcon, feels the spirits of the past blanket her. Her child twists around insider her, Rey places a hand on her tummy in an attempt to soothe her babe. Over the past few months, her little one’s presence had become stronger, the Force flowing strongly through them.

_ I’m here, little one. You’re safe. _

She doesn’t notice Chewie approach. He gently roars.

“I’m a few months along, and no, I can’t tell if they’re a boy or girl. All I know is that I love them so much, I would do anything for this child,”

Chewie nods, telling her about his son.

“Does it ever go away?” she asks softly, “This overwhelming fear,”

He shakes his head and then places something in her hand. She opens her palm to find a golden chain with two dice.

“For luck,” he roars before returning to the cockpit.

That night she dreams of a child with curly black hair who shines brighter than any star in the galaxy.

-

Ahch-To was just as cold and wet as she remembered. She sighs, regretting her decision to not bring a cloak.

Luke’s old hut stands, untouched, Rey enters, pausing for a moment as the signature of her old Master surrounds her. She goes through his things, even putting on one of his old cloaks. To her dismay, no remains of old Jedi knowledge remain. All he ever had she already possessed.

She walks out of the hut, defeated and ready to return home when she sees the small gathering of Lanais. She smiles awkwardly at them, remembering their disdain for her. They whisper among themselves before one of them marches up to her.

_ Uh oh. _

“C-3PO!” she calls out, unsure of what it is they want.

He talks for a bit with the Lanai before turning to her, “Wonderful news Mistress Rey! The Lanais have noticed your condition and insist you let them perform their ceremony of life on you!”

“Ceremony of Life? Listen I have to go back to Tatooine-”

The Lanai shouts and shakes her head before motioning to her fellow sisters.

“Mistress Rey, this is an ancient ceremony! It would offend them greatly if you refuse! Doesn’t anyone care about proper protocol anymore-”

“Alright! I’ll go get purified,” she says, glaring at Chewie when he lets out a laugh.

The ceremony takes place at dusk, she is led to the beach where the Lanais have lit a large bonfire.

_ I hope this isn’t a plot to eat us. _

They sit her down and C-3PO tells her that she must close her eyes. She feels them braid her hair, weaving the island flowers into it. They start to chant in the ancient Jedi language.

_ May the Force be with this woman and her child. May their stars shine bright. _

She then feels a cool splash of water thrown on her arms as they place around her neck a simple shell necklace.

_ Let the gift of the sea bless this girl with good fortune! _

_ Pure of heart may this child be, may the Force always be with them. May this child light up the sky. _

With that, they tell her to open her eyes as they set sparklers into the bonfire, a favor to the island’s spirit in the hopes that their calls would be answered.

Rey feels touched, she had never had any traditions. Nobody on Jakku had a sense of community. The closest things to rituals were scrubbing away dirt together or in a rare moment of kindness, sharing a meal when someone passed away.

That night she lays awake on Luke’s cot, feeling her baby toss and turn inside. Their spirit had been restless since they left Tatooine, most likely affected by the change in scenery and coming into contact with the signature of their ancestors.

She wondered for a moment whether her child would truly light up the sky if she could save them from the darkness that plagued their family. If her child would grow up to become someone as charming as Han, strong as Leia and loving as Ben. Though all her visions had been plagued with a child who would take the throne she refused, she was comforted for a moment at the thought of a child who would represent the best of their family.

Sensing their mother’s thoughts, her baby suddenly twists, and she feels a calming signature surround her. Tears filled her eyes as she realizes that her baby is trying to comfort her.

She clutches the shell necklace and repeats the words of the Lania.

_ May this child light up the sky. _

__ __ _ I’ll always love you, my little star. _

When she dreams, she sees herself under a large tree, a babe in her arms and Ben beside her.   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally off Tatooine! Also C-3PO is the funniest character to write ever! This chapter was really touching to write, I love the idea of the Skywalker's old friends coming to help Rey. Also just as an FYI Lanai is the name of the Fish-Nuns (had to look that up!) just in case anyone else was confused and thought their proper name was Fish-Nuns ;) Rey thinks she won't find answers, but I'm gonna guess she might be wrong. Thank you again for reading! Please leave a like and a comment, I love reading and responding to them! Sorry again for any mistakes. Hoped you all enjoyed!!


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